Friday, December 19, 2008

Sexist boy of mine…

While having dinner at my parents’ house Nick will be sure to bring his plate to the kitchen, scrape his plate in the trash and place it in the sink, WITHOUT being asked and regardless of the fact that my mother says “Oh, that’s okay, Nick, you don’t have to do that.” (as a grandma would say). I tell her Yes, he should do that and beam with pride because he makes me look good...Well doesn’t he?

But don’t be fooled. My boy will not do the same for me at home. I have to remind him to clean off his plate and place it in the sink, and this request usually follows with a “Ugh” and “Heavy Sighs” and the usual: “Why do I have to work, I’m done with work”…(translation: he works all day at school so give him a break). One day while my brother was over for dinner, Nick told him that clean up and doing the dishes was “Mom’s job.” Nice, ‘eh!!

Oh Boy, did sirens go off in my head. Please note that I am against the notion that men and women have their specific jobs in the household. I don’t care if women are stay at home moms (I don’t like the term: homemaker), men should share in the cleaning of the home as well. I cringe when I walk past the toy vacuums and ironing boards in toy stores… and I don’t think that people are buying these toys for their sons. I am not saying that I’m totally against gender specific toys like Barbie (as it is a real issue for some women) but I think if the child wants the Barbie then fine … it’s a personality thing in my opinion. But don’t eliminate the football from her toy box, either.

So I started making sure that he takes out the trash and cleans off his plate. I did start having him empty the dishwasher, but that, to him, was like asking him to build the pyramids of Egypt!! My point is that he complained through the task every step of the way, and because he is a bit of a slow worker, it did take him quite a while. The bad mother in me just couldn’t take the complaining for the long 15, or so, minutes it took him to complete the chore (with my help) … So, I will just stick him with trash, mail, hanging up his clothes, and Windex-washing windows duties for now, because they offer quicker relief and a feeling that he has accomplished something sooner—and then come sooner smiles and sigh of relief when he is done. And I will work him up to dishwasher duties, eventually. But I am relieved that he knows to help out at my mom’s house, so that’s something!!

But I do know where he gets his sexist attitude; it comes from me doing the housework because I work at home. And also because I like a clean house (as my son does) and my husband couldn’t care less.

Speaking of housecleaning, how's this for sexist: Have you heard the one about the maid and her skimpy little French number?

No joke … it's real. It's about a businessman who needed more money and hired his wife out to clean houses wearing a skimpy maid's outfit, apparently business is boobing ... I mean booming!

My opinion: if the woman thought of the idea herself then great, but it was her husband who did. What do you think?


Mama Mara said...

Your son and my sons must read the same newsletter on how to drive moms crazy with whining during chores! They don't seem to think it's women's work: they are simply opposed to all work. Arggh.

As for the French maid bit, it gives me the howling fantods. Pimping out your wife just ain't cool, dude.

Tanya @ Teenautism said...

Nigel complains endlessly about the few chores I have him do. He'd rather anyone other than himself do chores: male, female, robot, or mammal (he thinks the cats should clean out their own litter box). He has better things to do, like building a tower of Lego up to the ceiling or watching Lego YouTube videos . . .