First, what a great teacher…
As a continuation of my last post (anxiety issues at school), Nick’s teacher sent me this email the very next day:
Hi Mrs. Collins,
I sent Mr. S., the principal, an email regarding the lockdown. Attached is his
response. My GUESS is it will be this week, but please be sure to tell Nick I spoke
with Mr.(Principal) and the alarms are NOT expected to go off. I know Nick talked to me
yesterday about being nervous about the loud noise from the fire alarm.
Thanks so much,
(Teacher)
Hi (Principal),
My student Nick is VERY anxious about the lockdown drill. Do you
know if the fire alarm will be going off, he's worried about the
noise.
Also, I know we aren't supposed to know when it is, but he is
leaving for Florida on Monday and I don't want him to continue to
be upset the rest of the week. Is there any way to know if we are
having the drill this week? He now needs to be walked to class
with a para because his anxiety is so high. I also have his
mother's cell phone number to call her if we have it while he is
on vacation so he won't ruin his vacation worrying about the
drill.
Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you so much.
(Teacher)
Hi (Teacher),
The drill will be sooner than later. His vacation will not be ruined. In
fact, he will be relieved. The alarm is not supposed to go off during the
drill. Thanks.
(Principal)
What’s also great is that Nick’s psychiatrist got my message about my concern about him needing more meds (based on what I have noted about Nick)… and his response was: he agreed and has already called in a new script to the pharmacy… and all within a 24 hour period, too…. Hey!!
And don’t look now but we seem to be on a roll… I left a message for the pediatrician asking for a note, stating that Nick has autism, so that we can get a disability pass at Disney… Even though I kinda felt like a heel ... I mean, I called and had to leave a message on the nurse’s "hotline" number… “Hi, uhhhhh, I know you're busy, but, um ... we’re going to Disney next week and I wanted to get a, uhhhh, note from the doctor saying that my son has autism so he can, um (cut in line and be first for rides at Disney), get a disability pass" … Ugh... But, the nurse called me back--2 hours later-- (same nurse as always—nice woman) and said, “Of course we can do that, no problem…. Who do I address it to at Disney?" Whoa!!
And they had the letter ready for me the very next day.
Hey, we’re getting some good service around here!!
And I'm feeling so good that I'm running off to buy myself a new pair of shoes!! Yum ... They're nice designer ones at Marshalls for only 30 bucks... Hey, some healthy, guilt-free shopping-- just for me!!
Showing posts with label parenting an autistic child. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting an autistic child. Show all posts
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Friday, February 6, 2009
When the common cold causes common problems
Meghan has a common cold, therefore she is experiencing SIB (self injurious behavior) and assaultive behavior – not uncommon for Meghan and not uncommon for a lot of kids with autism. As some may know from your own autistic children, SIBs are hand biting, hair pulling, and some kids are even prone to head banging. Meghan has never done the latter, but hand biting is very common for her; so common that she sports a dry skin rash on her hand – a consequential blemish and a sign of a repetitive SIB problem.
As her mother it is never easy to hear that she has exhibited these behaviors, and, unfortunately, it seems just about every other week I’m told by her school contact teacher that she has exhibited SIBs – a solemn but true fact of life with Meghan.
It’s common sense to write down what triggered the behaviors in the first place, but sometimes I’m told it’s a mystery. Yeah, right? … uh, not really. As her mom -- and the only person who knows her so well -- I know that her hand biting is obviously due to a sign of frustration (well that’s evident to all), but with a few other imperceptible facts I can usually pinpoint what caused the outburst in the first place, such as: she is not getting what she wants (the stubborn girl); she is not completely understood (the frustrated girl); she wants her dinner and NOW (the very hungry girl); or she is not feeling well: fighting a cold or other (the poor sick girl).
What do these facts really do for me other than help me feel less helpless? Yeah, that’s what it comes down to. She can’t get away with these behaviors no matter what prompted them, but I feel as though I owe it to her to at least understand “why” she exhibits SIB and destructive behavior, and yesterday was no different. I had to hold my breath because I received two calls from her school (did you get that — two): one was her scheduled call from her teacher to tell me that she had some SIB, and the other was from the nurse. Yikes, the nurse call is never a good sign! I was told that she bit a teacher and drew blood. Ouch. Ouch to the fact that biting someone else hasn’t happened in over six months, and the first incident at her new school.
And now that you know that I feel helpless -- as one would in this situation -- what does a helpless parent do with this kind of information? Apologize? Certainly not. Actually, one of the very first and very wise comments made years ago by one of her teachers was: “You should never feel as though you have to apologize for your autistic child.” How true is that? And she was right, so I don’t -- and nor should you. Instead, I ask what lead to the problem to get to the “why”; the inexcusable, but explainable “why.”
As for yesterday I already knew that Meghan wasn’t feeling well -- and to me -- that only means that she’s nothing more than a ticking time bomb and I must wait patiently for these inevitable calls -- and without apology.
Don’t get me wrong; these are also the days that I feel bad for her teachers: the underpaid, sacrificial heroes that never let-up or run and hide (um, like I would – like anyone would when an enraged person is ready to strike), but, instead, they are unwavering in their approach and dedication to working with Meghan and not letting her autism get the better of her. Now that is a hero to Meghan and to the people who love her.
And I feel bad for me, too (yeah, I thought I’d throw that in), ‘cause she’s coming home today -- noontime to be exact. So if you’re the praying kind, then "pray." Pray for the weak, the vulnerable, the “prey” who is up against a nonverbal autistic girl and a very bad cold.
And her menstrual cycle.
As her mother it is never easy to hear that she has exhibited these behaviors, and, unfortunately, it seems just about every other week I’m told by her school contact teacher that she has exhibited SIBs – a solemn but true fact of life with Meghan.
It’s common sense to write down what triggered the behaviors in the first place, but sometimes I’m told it’s a mystery. Yeah, right? … uh, not really. As her mom -- and the only person who knows her so well -- I know that her hand biting is obviously due to a sign of frustration (well that’s evident to all), but with a few other imperceptible facts I can usually pinpoint what caused the outburst in the first place, such as: she is not getting what she wants (the stubborn girl); she is not completely understood (the frustrated girl); she wants her dinner and NOW (the very hungry girl); or she is not feeling well: fighting a cold or other (the poor sick girl).
What do these facts really do for me other than help me feel less helpless? Yeah, that’s what it comes down to. She can’t get away with these behaviors no matter what prompted them, but I feel as though I owe it to her to at least understand “why” she exhibits SIB and destructive behavior, and yesterday was no different. I had to hold my breath because I received two calls from her school (did you get that — two): one was her scheduled call from her teacher to tell me that she had some SIB, and the other was from the nurse. Yikes, the nurse call is never a good sign! I was told that she bit a teacher and drew blood. Ouch. Ouch to the fact that biting someone else hasn’t happened in over six months, and the first incident at her new school.
And now that you know that I feel helpless -- as one would in this situation -- what does a helpless parent do with this kind of information? Apologize? Certainly not. Actually, one of the very first and very wise comments made years ago by one of her teachers was: “You should never feel as though you have to apologize for your autistic child.” How true is that? And she was right, so I don’t -- and nor should you. Instead, I ask what lead to the problem to get to the “why”; the inexcusable, but explainable “why.”
As for yesterday I already knew that Meghan wasn’t feeling well -- and to me -- that only means that she’s nothing more than a ticking time bomb and I must wait patiently for these inevitable calls -- and without apology.
Don’t get me wrong; these are also the days that I feel bad for her teachers: the underpaid, sacrificial heroes that never let-up or run and hide (um, like I would – like anyone would when an enraged person is ready to strike), but, instead, they are unwavering in their approach and dedication to working with Meghan and not letting her autism get the better of her. Now that is a hero to Meghan and to the people who love her.
And I feel bad for me, too (yeah, I thought I’d throw that in), ‘cause she’s coming home today -- noontime to be exact. So if you’re the praying kind, then "pray." Pray for the weak, the vulnerable, the “prey” who is up against a nonverbal autistic girl and a very bad cold.
And her menstrual cycle.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
